dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Randomize
