Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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