I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
