I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
