If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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