I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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