yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize