New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
