During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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