So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
