just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
