WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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