you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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