We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i came on her dog
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize