im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I think I won the penis lottery.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
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I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
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Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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