Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
