sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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