Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
