So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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