Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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