I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
