My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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