i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
