Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize