Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize