There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize