is your mom at the bar?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I just gargled with NyQuil
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
