I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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