I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
