after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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