I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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