i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
