HIV tests are more positive than that guy
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize