Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
only if we run a train.
done.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
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