just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
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