this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
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Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
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She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on