Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.

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(203): You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi. http://tfl.nu/yrsa

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(208): View more from Idaho

just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.

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(208): just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again. http://tfl.nu/8lay

Replies (13) Good night (1195) Bad night (5900)
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(706): View more from Georgia

Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.

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(706): Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus. http://tfl.nu/wtrd

Replies (16) Good night (1059) Bad night (3719)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.

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(215): I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy. http://tfl.nu/orpn

Replies (16) Good night (2896) Bad night (978)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.

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(732): You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire. http://tfl.nu/i4tp

Replies (7) Good night (1661) Bad night (759)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?

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(570): there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i? http://tfl.nu/asxg

Replies (5) Good night (1824) Bad night (665)
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(559): View more from California

she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.

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(559): she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer. http://tfl.nu/y0m8

Replies (8) Good night (972) Bad night (2083)
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(209): View more from California

Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....

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(209): Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage.... http://tfl.nu/5in8

Replies (2) Good night (884) Bad night (487)
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(914): View more from New York

Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.

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(914): Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table. http://tfl.nu/r09f

Replies (9) Good night (552) Bad night (1151)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.

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(701): Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one. http://tfl.nu/mish

Replies (8) Good night (736) Bad night (966)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward

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(248): Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward http://tfl.nu/e7xn

Replies (4) Good night (723) Bad night (455)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples

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(414): Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples http://tfl.nu/ypsl

Replies (3) Good night (361) Bad night (651)
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(641): View more from Iowa

The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects

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(641): The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects http://tfl.nu/vfz8

Replies (3) Good night (334) Bad night (185)
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(281): View more from Texas

I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"

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(281): I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop" http://tfl.nu/oaao

Replies (0) Good night (368) Bad night (165)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.

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(215): It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics. http://tfl.nu/pu5z

Replies (4) Good night (398) Bad night (162)

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