Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
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