Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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