FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
