vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.