its not stalking. its research.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
she looked like the before picture.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Randomize
