I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
