i jhust puked up my retainher.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize