Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i think i have herpe
just one?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize