I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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