I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
