I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
