There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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