you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Randomize