i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
